Thursday, December 15, 2011

The Meticulous Moody vs. Jose' Jelephino

Are you ready for some football!?! A Monday Night Party!

I think that’s how the song went. I was trying to deliver some kind of melodic motivator as we begin the Week of Ethics. But then again, both that song and that logo has absolutely nothing to do with this blogpost. It’s hard to find a good beat out there that is relevant to ethics. I mean come on now, what kind of musical superstar out there actually has good ethics? Name one, I dare you.

For this story, I take you to the office of a workplace, a very generic workplace, a workplace that shall not be given any proper or official title. It is in this workplace when the paths of two people will cross in a very unnatural, peculiar manner. Please, let me introduce them to you. Curtains up…

The Meticulous Moody: This is a man who is very friendly, very outgoing, very personable, but for some odd reason cannot put a name and a face together. Every time he sees a recognizable persona, he gives them the usual “Hey, man, old buddy, how’s uh…how’s everything going in your uh…generic lifestyle that I can’t quite put my finger on?”

Jose’ Jelephino: Say his last name accentuating the “I” to get the full effect. Jose is a die-hard Lakers fan whose primary language is actually Hispanic, however he speaks fairly decent English, and could more than likely carry on a conversation with a batch of high school seniors (who aren’t texting might I add).

Jose’ Jelephino steps into the office of The Meticulous Moody to catch up on old times. Keep in mind, they have never had “old times”. The two of them haven’t shared more than six sentences between them both, so how on earth are they supposed to talk isolated for longer than ten seconds at a time?

As Jose’ Jelephino steps in, the usual subjects of weather, work, and academics get brought up, and the two of them converse over nonspecific sub-details, meanwhile in the back of his head The Meticulous Moody is counting down the seconds until the lunch bell rings so that he can be rescued by a ham and cheese sandwich at home. Out of nowhere, Jose’ launches a talking trap that could ruin The Meticulous Moody’s afternoon.

Jose’ Jelephino: “Say man, what you think about the Lakers man? What you think about them getting beat real bad by Dallas? Kinda crazy, no?”

Uh-oh, Jose’ has just opened up a black hole of dialogue as The Meticulous Moody has a massive passion for basketball, and the Los Angeles Lakers. This could lead to hours and hours of rants about professional sports between two sub-par acquaintances!

The Meticulous Moody: Holding back his Jim Rome/Pardon the Interruption urges, reaches into his pocket and grabs a hold of his cell phone. “Uh…yeah…about that trade. I uh…”
Stammering out words like ‘triangle’ ‘retirement’ and ‘Metta World Peace’ he slowly but surely dials the number to his work phone and presses send.

The Meticulous Moody: “The entire series was ruined when…”

RING! RING! RING! Saved by the interrupting phone on his desk.

The Meticulous Moody: “Some generic workplace, this is The Meticulous Moody, how can I help you?” He is answered by the blank pause of nothingness on the other end of the line.

The Meticulous Moody: “Oh really? Are you serious? Well I, uh...can you hold on just a minute?” Turning to Jose’ Jelephino he says, “This is gonna take a while.”

Politely, Jose’ stands up and nodding with a smile on his face mouths the words ‘I’ll come back some other time’ as he walks out the door. The Meticulous Moody continues to have a conversation with himself as Jose’ Jelephino exits stage left. As soon as he’s out of sight, the phone is set back down on the desk, and The Meticulous Moody goes back to his regularly scheduled program of busy work.

Is that wrong? Was what he did incorrect? Or was The Meticulous Moody just trying to very softly, very politely escort a bi-lingual individual out of his office without having to be rude and insist that he leave at once? Some say he’s rude, some say he’s inconsiderate. But as for my 44 consistent readers, I leave you these four simple words:

You be the judge.

What do you think?


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