O-H-I-O!

Round trip red-eye flight from Las Vegas, Nevada to Columbus, Ohio discounted after Skymiles reimbursement: $11 Rental car, hotel reservations, and lunch at a Waffle House: $472.83 Ticket for Section 12B, Row 3, Seat 5, purchased through Stubhub: $107.44 Standing in The Shoe for the first time in my life, screaming my face off with 108,364 other fans of the team I have worshipped since the womb: Priceles...

Why?!?!?!

I know I've said in the past that when I decide to pass on I would like to have my remains donated to science, or to a museum, or to the back shelves in the frozen closet of a mediocre community college that doesn't have the budget to pay for the development of their Anatomy program. So let it be written, so let it be done. When my time on this Earth runs out, whether that is next week, in six months, or in the year 2050, I have always stated...

I'm With Stupid

When I was 16 years old a pretty girl in my choir class named Sara Stevenson picked me up for an afternoon of snowmobiling on her family ranch. In the midst of our winter festivities/semi-flirtatious extravaganza, I saw a pair of kids who were sledding down the hill on her property. “Let’s go give them a drive-by snowballing.” I said as we packed our gloves for a winter version of violence. Staring down the ten-year olds holding toboggans, we...

Who Knows?

There are moments in our life that will shape our character and alter the road we will take. I know that sounds like single Mother poetry in a Starbucks or some kind of Ray Bradbury/Robert Frost concoction doused in brandy, but I don't care. We have moments in life that change who we are, moments that mold the role we have undertaken for this crazy existence we all checked ourselves in to playing.  In some of those moments we feel great....

I'm Not Listening

You love giving me advice on how to get married. Every last one of you. And I in turn love to take it all in, nod my head like I'm in agreement, and then store it all away for an epic blogpost two years later. For full effect, download chapter 8 of "Brave New World" by Aldous Huxley, and play at maximum volume throughout the duration of this post. I suggest that text because it is the chapter that has been keeping me awake for the last, oh...

I Wish That I Could Be Like The Cool Kids

A recent study from that one school that shall not be named linked an increase in Facebook usage to a decrease in your own satisfaction and a higher likelihood of personal depression.  Homer Simpson: “To Social Media! The cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.” For full effect, download “Cool Kids” by Echosmith, and play at maximum volume throughout the duration of this post. Seriously, if there were one song that fits...

When I Grow Up...

I think someone has their sights set a little too low....