Wednesday, January 7, 2015

Ain't That The Truth


Normally this post is designed to mock the concept of New Year’s resolutions and the bombardment of gym memberships that will go spiraling down the drain because of the “holiday of rebirth”. You know how cynical your Dad can be at times. But I’ve changed kids, we all change. Today, I want to tell you one of the most significant lessons I have learned over the last few months of my life. And that lesson is a simple, clear phrase that will get you further down the road than anything else ever will.

Be honest.

For full effect, download “I’m Gonna Be” by Sleeping At Last, and play at maximum volume throughout the duration of this post.   

Kids, life is full of deceit. Everyone around you is lying all the time; family, friend, foe, old fart, young fart, genius, idiot, boy, girl, black, white, green, it doesn’t matter. Whether it’s the weight on their scales, the dollar amount attached to their annual salaries, the number of medications they’re popping back as morning cocktails, or even their alibi for where they were on Friday at 2 in the morning. Everybody lies, that’s plain and simple Brocktrine to its core. And if someone says they are not lying, you can bet your next stepson those last four words out of their mouths are laced with slander.

We lie in relationships. All the time. We lie to the people we want to please the most in hopes that someday down the road they will see past our dishonesty and settle for the reality of our disappointment. We tell them we are something special, when really we’re not. We build imaginary edifices of creatures we think will be most appealing to those we are in hot pursuit of attaining. We lie through our teeth, hiding our weaknesses in hopes they will ignore them and won’t view our shortcomings as potential red flags. We lie about who we are every single day to every single person we take out to dinner. Sometimes those lies carry on past engagements and well on into marriages. And those are the lies that seem to hurt the most.

Why do we do this, kids? I really don’t know. Maybe it’s because we think people won’t accept us for having flaws. Maybe it’s because we don’t believe in our true characters, the characters that only we know exist, the characters that have been built through years and years of experience and quietly come out when we are by ourselves and everyone else has left us alone. Maybe it’s because we don’t like ourselves. And we have this clouded perception that if we don’t like ourselves, then how the curse word will anyone else like us either? Maybe it’s because this world is a messed up place, telling us we should be something exceptional, that we should fit some kind of mold, that we should be a cardboard cutout of success, an expectation of brilliance.

The sad thing is, those expectations we have and the reality that ensues, very rarely, if ever, match up.

Now kids, I know over the years I’ve given you points of advice in this blog that I feel are some of the most important life lessons you need to hold on to during the course of your own journeys, and who knows where the Muse for this post of spiritual guidance is coming from. All I can say is this: I don’t care what you do, I don’t care what faults you have, what screw-ups you’ve concocted, or what failures you are ashamed to bring out to the public. If you want to succeed in this life with your academics, with your careers, and most importantly with the relationships of the ones you hold the closest to you, be honest and tell the truth.

You may think you are a complete waste, and that you need to formulate some odd concoction of mistruths that will make your worth look more appealing on the surface for the world to judge you. You may think that lies are what will make you look better and will have you be accepted by someone you want to be with for the rest of your days. But here’s the thing. In the long run, you won’t look better. In the long run, those truths will eventually come out into the open. In the long run, your real character is going to be exposed. And you need to find someone who will L-word the Hell out of who you really, truly are. 

Not for someone you aren’t. 

What do you think?

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