I might as well get used to this location.
With my eyelids drooping and yet another day stumbling along, I thought I would delve into yet another component of dating and relationships, this of course being the highly touted W.O.D. part deux. Thank you Charlie Sheen. Oh by the way his angels are making their second-tier debut tonight on television. Join the classy yet casual shindig at my apartment if you'd like to. I wont be there, but Chief Kent is a mighty fine host.
Back to live action.
For full effect, download "Spirit of the Wild" by Ted Nugent from iTunes, and play at maximum volume throughout the duration of this post.
In my life I have come across laws and rules that I know to be more true than the fact that women L-word chocolate. The first rule of Brocktrine was something that I blogged about a few weeks earlier, and this is that we always want what we can't have. The second rule of Brocktrine, something that has driven all of us mad when it comes to any type of dating scheme is this; whoever has the least amount of interest in a relationship has the most control in that relationship.
Chew on that for a bit while Nugent drones away in the background.
Think about it from your own personal perspective. Take your last intimate relationship with someone and use it as the example for this. Whenever two people meet and make some type of connection, one becomes the giver and one becomes the receiver. One of them is the hunter and the other the hunted. Whoever is the hunted controls the movement and dynamics of the relationship.
The hunted do what they please, they frolic around on their own schedule, on their own time, meanwhile the hunter breaks down the logistics of the relationship, analyzes the movement of their prey, ponders and thinks about the next steps of flirtation and courtship that will be taken, caters their course of action around the movement of the hunted. Meanwhile, the hunted doesn't give a whim about the other, they just enjoy having the power.
You may be shaking your head in disagreement at me right now, thinking to yourself, "Oh Swamp Thing, you are so naive and incorrect about how relationships work. If only you had a clue as to how they really are."
No, this is exactly how they really are. I know this.
Take for instance my most recent attempt at a failed relationship. I met a great girl, a bomb.com girl, (yes I did just use the phrase bomb.com). She was smart, witty, ambitious, educated, and tough. Add to the fact that she was ridiculously good-looking and she seemed to be the total package. After knocking me off my feet I became the victim of being the hunter. I waited impatiently for text messages, I debated with friends about what my next plan of attack would be, heck I even read the second volume of the Hunger Games in hopes that she and I would have something to talk about.
But it was to no avail. She was the hunted, and therefore had total control of the speed and potential of a future doomed relationship meanwhile I sat on the sideline twiddling my thumbs playing the role of a pathetic loser who had never spoken to a female counterpart before in my life. Heck, Elmer Fudd did a better job chasing down Bugs Bunny than I did. I was befuddled, frustrated, and because I got caught up in the chase I came off like a creep.
Cue background music by Radiohead.
Who knows what might have happened had the roles been reversed and I had been the hunted? And yeah, it's sad that this law of Brocktrine exists. But it does. And if you're currently the prey, enjoy it while it lasts. Because one day you might be the hunter. And thats the worst role you can play.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad
Location: McKay-Dee Hospital
Be a honey badger and don't care.
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